Michelle Harvey-Fogg
Therapeutic COUNSELLING IN Worthing, West Sussex & online
Why do I keep doing the same things?
Repetition compulsion, a concept first described by Sigmund Freud, refers to our unconscious tendency to recreate unresolved emotional experiences. In attachment-based therapy, we understand this pattern through the lens of early relationships. The bonds you formed with caregivers shaped your nervous system’s expectations about love, safety, and belonging. If you grew up with inconsistency, criticism, or emotional distance, those dynamics can feel strangely familiar in adulthood. You might pursue partners who are unavailable, feel anxious when someone gets close, or withdraw when intimacy deepens. This isn’t self-sabotage—it’s your attachment system trying to maintain what feels known, even if it’s painful. […]
Perfectionism and Attachment: Why letting go feels so hard.
Perfectionism is often misunderstood as a personality trait or a sign of high achievement. In reality, perfectionism is frequently rooted in early attachment experiences, and developed as a way to stay emotionally safe in relationships. From an attachment-based perspective, perfectionism begins in childhood when love, approval, or emotional availability feels conditional. Children adapt to ...
Understanding Attachment: How our early relationships shape us.
The word “attachment” is often used in therapy, but at its heart it’s about something deeply human: our need for connection, safety, and belonging. From our earliest relationships, we learn what to expect from others and from ourselves. Were we soothed when we were upset? Did we feel seen, protected, or understood? These early experiences quietly shape how we relate to people later in life. Attachment patterns can show up in many ways. You might notice anxiety about being left, discomfort with closeness, difficulty trusting others, or a tendency to put others’ needs far beyond your own. These patterns are […]
People Pleasing: Why We Do It and How to Heal
Many people who come to therapy describe themselves as “people pleasers.” At first, it may sound like a positive trait – who doesn’t want to be kind, helpful, and agreeable? But if you’ve ever found yourself exhausted, resentful...
Understanding Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) and it’s link to ADHD
Living with ADHD often comes with challenges that aren't always visible to others. One of the least talked about, is something called Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD).